The Darkside of Community

I can’t do drama anymore. When I come home from work I want random escapist entertainment. I love movies like UHF, Tommy Boy, and Happy Gilmore. I get enough serious situations in my work. So, I rejoiced at the recent television show “Community.” If you haven’t seen it, the show revolves around a group of community college students who form a study group. They are all dysfunctional in their own ways and led by Joel McHale’s character “Jeff Winger.” Each week they embark on some absurd adventure that leads to conflict and argument. Crazy situations are always resolved at the end by each member admitting fault and extending grace to one another in some strange manner. It is one of the most creatively written shows I have seen in a long time and it’s one of the better examples I have seen of true community; Messy, diverse, dysfunctional, confrontational and in constant need of grace.

I guess for some time I assumed that “Biblical” community meant getting a foretaste of what Heaven will be like. Everyone would agree because the Spirit of God would help us all interpret the Bible the same way. We would love one another seeing through God’s eyes. We would want to hang out all the time. Everyone would be equally committed to the good of the group. We would wear the same clothes, eat the same foods, listen to the same music, reject Justin Beiber, and understand the musical contribution of “Daft Punk.” (Sorry, I got a little carried away) In all seriousness, I thought that the more Godly the group, the less conflict would arise. The most important thing I have learned in two years of leading a church is that REAL, HEALTHY, BIBLICAL COMMUNITY MEANS MORE CONFLICT NOT LESS!

I am like you, I don’t like confronting others when I have sinned against them, or vice versa. I get nervous, stressed, and scared. I wonder what they might say. I wonder if they will reject me. I wonder if I am seeing the conflict clearly. I wonder if its “just me.” Anyone who loves conflict is an abuser.

However if there is no conflict, chances are your group is too homogenous, or more likely too shallow. Confrontation is our practical way of confessing our insecurities and sin to one another, saying we value the person enough to be uncomfortable, while subjecting our relationships to the Lordship of Christ. It is the most obvious example of confessing “It’s not about me.”

We know God wants His people to be Humble, but have we acknowledged that He has instituted Christian community as a primary means of humbling us, NOT making us more comfortable. While its true that we many times experience the love of Christian brothers and sisters, that is still not the main point. If it becomes the main point, you will run when hurt by another. We are humbled by recognizing our need for one another as God reveals Himself through a diversity of experiences. We are humbled as we confess sin to one another. We are humbled as we serve. We are humbled as we forgive those who have offended and hurt us. If we run from sacrifice and pain, we run from the most integral experiences of the cross that empowered the Gospel itself!

I want to acknowledge, there are abusive communities that are not committed to the Gospel, but to something else all together. Whether it be comfort, like-mindedness or any other seemingly virtuous goal, it’s important to recognize that any group of people not aimed first at glorifying Christ is NOT a Biblical one. The distinction is made not to heap condemnation but to clarify expectation so that we would not condemn the “Church” by mistaking it for something else all together. Biblical community is messy, diverse, dysfunctional, confrontational and in constant need of grace, but nevertheless committed to Jesus Christ over self.

In short, we engage in Biblical community because it is how God fully reveals Himself in Christ, humbles His people, and invites them into living the Gospel. To run from the Church is to run from Christ.

If you are committed to Biblical community, how have you gotten over conflict? Love to hear your comments!

Aarron